Wednesday, January 6, 2010

Love/lust/apathy

I question motivation. Dad told me the trouble, the commitment, sticking your dick in, will bring. There are diseases. Pregnancy. But worse still- Emotional attachment. I get it. I really do. The coital bliss. The sense of connection Tantra means to extend. But this time, she ruined the mood. Talk of.... nonsense. Ex's. Mine and hers. Moments after the fact. I still question her motivations. After another $50+ bar tab. What sort of ride, is she looking to take. When details go in one ear out the other. Repeated questions. Imply lack of initial interest. Does she suffer from PGS [Pretty Girl Syndrome] With all the usual symptoms- turns heads, poor conversation skills,
expensive tastes. She asked, numerous times, my sign, Aquarius. [bow down bitches!!] She asked what that means. Recall Emma's magnet- aloof, unattached, unemotional... Some would say bad attributes. I say good survival skills. While all apply. At times. Opposite is true. Now I see possibilities. Hopefully a kink or two. No adoption papers. Once again leading a girl on? Though she already seems prepared. After last night, I see the problems, connections bring.
Family or otherwise. Hopefully no cops get called this time.

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